Buh-Bye

I just spent the last two hours catching and crating the chickens.

No easy task. Those dang roosters must have known what was coming. I consulted with a coworker (the person who gave me the half-grown birds in the first place) on how to catch them since half of them have taken to roosting in the barn rafters. Her suggestion was to take a broad broom or garden rake and bump the birds in the chest to get them to step on the new "perch" and lift them down.

So I waited until dark and for the birds to roost. I had to flush one out of the "attic space" over the tack room at dusk so it would be in the barn with the others. Once everybird was inside I closed up the barn doors. I figured the more confined the better. I started with the center aisle lights on, then just the feed room lights on, but the birds still walked around on the rafters like it was daylight. Finally I just gave up and killed all the lights so the only illumination came from the yard light, shining in through a few small windows.

I went for the Ring Leader first. I should have known better. Even in the dark he would evade the rake and move just out of reach. I even crept up a ladder I placed before dark and tried to grab him, but he took off and flew across to the next rafter just as my fingertips touched his feathers. After a little shuffling and resettling, he perched near the ladder again. This time I brought a draw-string laundry bag, hoping I could basically bag-and-scoop but he took off even quicker. This time he and his buddies huddled themselves in a cluster (flustercluck?) just out of reach of my tools. Flipped on the barn lights and figured the least I could do would be to herd them into the coop/stall so at least a few would be easier to catch when reinforcements could arrive the next evening.

OK, new approach. Three birds had roosted in the stall, so I went in there and closed the door behind me. My initial plan was to grab them off their roosts and stuff them into the dog crate I had in the stall with me. Didn't take long chasing a bunch of dark colored roosters in the dark on the floor of the stall. Is it a bird? Is it a shadow? No! It's Super Wiley Rooster!

Plan F. Open dog crate, place in corner, herd chicken into open door, slam door shut and haul out the crate so I can transfer my quarry to the transport crate. Worked pretty good for on the first bird. The second bird (Ring Leader) put up a fight when I was doing the transfer, and I wound up with a big handful of feathers and another chase around the barn until I could get him back into the stall.

Ah ha! The more I can keep the barnlights off, the less of a fight the now blind and vulnerable birds put up. Two birds caught, three birds. Flip the barn lights back on, use my 10 foot longe whip (I new it would come in handy for something!) to flush the quarry from its hiding spot, and play a complicated game of cat and mouse, trying to first get the birds on the ground and then herd them into the stall. Two more go in; I never even bothered to let them roost before turning out the lights and played more chicken coop Marco Polo with Four. Five put up a good fight, but it's panting gave away its location. I left him in the coop in the dog crate while I finally flushed out Six and corralled him in the stall.

Lights out one more time. Transfer Five into the carrier. Odd how the chickens remain calm in the dark even as the carrier continues to get fuller. Back in the stall, and I quietly "shush, shush" to tell the bird where I am as I had his now-caught com-padres. Back and forth, back and forth. A few futile attempts at a vertical escape (("Go toward the (yard) light!")) before he wedged himself between the crate and the wall. One more flush and a little more back and forth, and Six took a few hesitant steps into the dog crate.

Close the door, deep breath, no sigh of relief until this one has joined his buddies in the travel carrier. As with the others, turn the dog crate on its end. Reach in and grab by the base of the wings. With the other hand release the bungee cord holding the lid shut on the carrier. In one swift move lift the lid and shove the bird in. Strange how the bird that was at the bottom of the pecking order was the last one to be caught; you think he should have been better at avoiding the avian bullies given his skill at evading me.

Flip on the barn lights, grab some baling twine and tie the lid shut. Release the dog from her exile in the tack room, and watch her and the cat sniff and explore this odd box and its feathered convicts. Call it a night, turn off the barn lights, leave the barn doors shut just in case... Go find a beer.

I wonder how the chicken soup will turn out.